Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Great Wall


Attended a Jack Johnson concert last night. Now, I didn't have a clue who Jack Johnson was or what kind of music he played. I just knew that the tickets were free, and that I was going to sit outside, hear some live music and enjoy a beverage or two on a school night. Not a bad deal.

Now, I could go on at length about the fact that the beer selection was awful and what you could get cost 12 bucks a pop. But I won't. As I said before, the tickets were free, so I didn't mind so much digging deep. Besides, a rare bit of cloud cover had dampened the evening blast furnace, and those of you who just spent the last thirty or so days "enjoying" 100+ degree days, well, you understand just how pleasant "90 in the shade" can feel. Toss in several thousand women dressed for such weather and a good spot to enjoy the show/scenery - now you've got a solid foundation for a good evening.

Music was good, too - Mr. Johnson is a talented guy. Put him in the "music/cd/concert that chicks enjoy - a lot - yet is tolerable for the average guy" genre (remember that - might just save your ass next birthday/anniversary/"insert generic gift-giving holiday here").

So what's my beef? Well, have you ever noticed the almost primal urge that proportionally challenged women have to stand up and "dance" at outdoor concerts? Worse yet, that they seem to travel in packs of five or six, and act as a group? I mean, one strum on the guy's guitar last night and suddenly many folks on the lawn knew exactly what it feels like to be Tony Romo on any given Sunday. Fortunately for Mr. Romo, however, that acreage of ass he's staring at when he barks out signals isn't involved in a "sexy dance" as the missus laughingly called it last night. Nor is it blocking his view of a show he paid to see.

Happened to me last night - right from the get go. Incredulous, I looked around to see if we were the only ones so fortunate. All around were people just like me, sitting on a blanket holding lukewarm-overpriced-bad beer in the hands, shaking their heads and clearly thinking "I paid 50 bucks to watch this shit?"

1 comment:

Taras Bulba said...

I feel your pain. Another beef: the now customary "WHOOOOOOOO" let out by women large and not so large to signal some type of enjoyment or approval of whatever sound or shiny object just came their way when in a group setting. Embarassing to behold. Popular with upper midwest gals whenever in a semi-celebratory setting.