Apparently, Elvis' death was a direct result of him not being able to take a good, country shit:
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2010/05/05/exclusive-elvis-presleys-doctor-claims-died-embarrassing-case-chronic/?test=faces. Had his momma been alive, this wouldn't have happened as every good Southern mother is regularly checking to see if her young uns are regular. Also, his mother would have been cooking for him and using grease stored in a canister next to the stove--that stuff damn sure kept generations of Southern boys moving their insides--I know it did the trick for me. Outside of cereal, I think that everything I ate had as its genesis a solid foundation of rancid, lard laden, and great tasting grease. Too bad, Elvis. You should have stopped off for fried chicken on Sundays.
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2010/05/05/exclusive-elvis-presleys-doctor-claims-died-embarrassing-case-chronic/?test=faces. Had his momma been alive, this wouldn't have happened as every good Southern mother is regularly checking to see if her young uns are regular. Also, his mother would have been cooking for him and using grease stored in a canister next to the stove--that stuff damn sure kept generations of Southern boys moving their insides--I know it did the trick for me. Outside of cereal, I think that everything I ate had as its genesis a solid foundation of rancid, lard laden, and great tasting grease. Too bad, Elvis. You should have stopped off for fried chicken on Sundays.
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